Glossary of Terms

SAFE, SANE and CONSENSUAL

Safe:
Safe is being knowledgeable about the techniques and safety concerns involved in what you are doing.   This refers primarily to physical safety, which is a cherished priority of "serious players" (i.e., those who are sincerely committed to D&S sexuality), who recognize the potential risk of inflicting extreme stimulus upon even a willing partner. The limits of genuinely safe play are constantly debated in the D&S community. Nonetheless, certain tenets are universal.
1. Safe sex: AIDS awareness and adherence to safer sex guidelines.
2. Protection of Vital Organs: no irreversible damage of any kind, nor any kind or degree of pain that the submissive did not request or knowledgeably consent to.

Sane:
Sane is knowing the difference between fantasy and reality, and acting in accordance with that knowledge.   Any given D&S activity done for the pleasure of everyone involved. Erotic play should not cause emotional anguish; it should not abuse the submissive's vulnerability or subject a sumbissive to unreasonable risk. And a submissive should not have to worry that the dominant will exceed his or her personal limits.

Consensual:
Consensual is respecting the limits imposed by each participant at all times. One of the recognized ways to maintain limits is through a "safeword" which ensures that each participant can end his/her participation with a word or gesture.  Clear, informed and verbalized consent is the moral dividing line between brutality and D&S. Partners must voluntarily and knowingly give full consent to D&S activity befoire it begins. D&Sers typically avoid any relations with minors, for example, because it is generally accepted that minors cannot give informed consent.

_{(The preceding was a combination of the definitions created by the participants at the 1998 Leather Leadership Conference in NYC and text taken from Different Loving, the World of Sexual Dominance & Submission by Gloria G. Brame, William D. Brame and Jon Jacobs)}

BDSM is Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism. A term used for those who play with psychological control and/or physical pain & restraint.

Bondage:
Restriction of a person's bodily movement for erotic reasons using fastenings of various kinds. Includes physical and mental bondage.

Discipline:
The imposition of rules and behavior on the bottom in domination scenes and the "punishments" used to enforce them.

Dominance:
The practice of running the scene, controlling the bottom's behavior, perhaps simply as a role play or humiliation or perhaps reinforced by the threat or the actual use of intense or painful physical activities directed at the bottom, and/or restriction, bondage and physical control.

Submission:
The act of or interest in submitting to someone else's will, within limits, for sexual and/or erotic purposes.

Sadism:
The act of being sexually aroused by the infliction of cruelty and pain on others or on themselves.

Masochism:
The act of deriving sexual pleasure from experiences normally thought of as painful, and enjoying such experiences.

For more definitions, check out the Deviant's Dictionary


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